Saturday, July 17, 2010

This showed up in my inbox today, and I hardcore loved it so much (and needed its medicine) that I thought it worth re-posting.  Much love to you all, and blessings as you continue to tune and re-tune into your own inner song.  :)Melissa

July 16, 2010

Tweet Less, Kiss More

By BOB HERBERT
I was driving from Washington to New York one afternoon on Interstate 95 when a car came zooming up behind me, really flying. I could see in the rearview mirror that the driver was talking on her cellphone.
I was about to move to the center lane to get out of her way when she suddenly swerved into that lane herself to pass me on the right — still chatting away. She continued moving dangerously from one lane to another as she sped up the highway.
A few days later, I was talking to a guy who commutes every day between New York and New Jersey. He props up his laptop on the front seat so he can watch DVDs while he’s driving.
“I only do it in traffic,” he said. “It’s no big deal.”
Beyond the obvious safety issues, why does anyone want, or need, to be talking constantly on the phone or watching movies (or texting) while driving? I hate to sound so 20th century, but what’s wrong with just listening to the radio? The blessed wonders of technology are overwhelming us. We don't control them; they control us.
We've got cellphones and BlackBerrys and Kindles and iPads, and we're e-mailing and text-messaging and chatting and tweeting — I used to call it Twittering until I was corrected by high school kids who patiently explained to me, as if I were the village idiot, that the correct term is tweeting. Twittering, tweeting — whatever it is, it sounds like a nervous disorder.
This is all part of what I think is one of the weirder aspects of our culture: a heightened freneticism that seems to demand that we be doing, at a minimum, two or three things every single moment of every hour that we're awake. Why is multitasking considered an admirable talent? We could just as easily think of it as a neurotic inability to concentrate for more than three seconds.
Why do we have to check our e-mail so many times a day, or keep our ears constantly attached, as if with Krazy Glue, to our cellphones? When you watch the news on cable television, there are often additional stories being scrolled across the bottom of the screen, stock market results blinking on the right of the screen, and promos for upcoming features on the left. These extras often block significant parts of the main item we're supposed to be watching.
A friend of mine told me about an engagement party that she had attended. She said it was lovely: a delicious lunch and plenty of Champagne toasts. But all the guests had their cellphones on the luncheon tables and had text-messaged their way through the entire event.
Enough already with this hyperactive behavior, this techno-tyranny and nonstop freneticism. We need to slow down and take a deep breath.
I'm not opposed to the remarkable technological advances of the past several years. I don't want to go back to typewriters and carbon paper and yellowing clips from the newspaper morgue. I just think that we should treat technology like any other tool. We should control it, bending it to our human purposes.
Let’s put down at least some of these gadgets and spend a little time just being ourselves. One of the essential problems of our society is that we have a tendency, amid all the craziness that surrounds us, to lose sight of what is truly human in ourselves, and that includes our own individual needs — those very special, mostly nonmaterial things that would fulfill us, give meaning to our lives, enlarge us, and enable us to more easily embrace those around us.
There’s a character in the August Wilson play “Joe Turner’s Come and Gone” who says everyone has a song inside of him or her, and that you lose sight of that song at your peril. If you get out of touch with your song, forget how to sing it, you're bound to end up frustrated and dissatisfied.
As this character says, recalling a time when he was out of touch with his own song, “Something wasn't making my heart smooth and easy.”
I don't think we can stay in touch with our song by constantly Twittering or tweeting, or thumbing out messages on our BlackBerrys, or piling up virtual friends on Facebook.
We need to reduce the speed limits of our lives. We need to savor the trip. Leave the cellphone at home every once in awhile. Try kissing more and tweeting less. And stop talking so much.
Listen.
Other people have something to say, too. And when they don't, that glorious silence that you hear will have more to say to you than you ever imagined. That is when you will begin to hear your song. That’s when your best thoughts take hold, and you become really you.

Monday, July 12, 2010

The Most Important Act

"As the bus slowed down at the crowded bus stop, the Pakistani bus conductor leaned from the platform and called out, "Six only!"  The bus stopped.  He counted on six passengers, rang the bell, and then, as the bus moved off, called to those left behind:  "So sorry, plenty of room in my heart - but the bus is full."  He left behind a row of smiling faces.  It's not what you do, it's the way that you do it."  ~The Friendship Book of Francis Gay, 1977


"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.  If you want to be happy, practice compassion."  ~Dalai Lama

 

Being a pretty thoughtful person by nature, I've become hyper-aware lately of the ways in which I can all too easily go on auto-pilot and even be the one yelling at the person in the car in front of me that is taking his precious time making a left turn when I'm trying desperately to get somewhere that is "more important" than being right where I am in that moment...if I tape myself, I would probably both cringe and laugh at how ridiculous and "important" I sound in those moments.  But as I wrote in a song [Be Here Now] recently, "The moment before me is all that I need, the fear and the sadness my guide.  The more that I open to all that I see, the more I feel it all dissolve into love."  Part of being open to all that I see means being present for those who stand before me.  It means asking "How are you?" and actually pausing to listen for the answer.  It means recognizing that I'm...ahem...not the only person on the road who is trying to get somewhere.  It might seem like it takes energy to pay attention, but the cost of NOT paying attention proves much more detrimental in the long-run--to our mental, physical, spiritual, emotional well-being, not to mention the well-being of those around us.

 

As far as I'm concerned, the most important acts in life are those of kindness.  Being on time is cool, but not when it means being rude in order to get there (note to self...:)...).  Being right and passionately expressing in that righteousness has its place, but most of the time we can fall into a trap of being "right" rather than being kind.  Justice is not truly just without compassion and Truth bears no meaning without love.  Social justice just doesn't even seem very "social" when anger and argumentativeness take precedent in our relations with one another.  I understand getting things done--BP is not going to stop oil from spewing into the ocean by standing around hugging and smiling at each other, but they aren't going to get things done in argument with one another either.  Just think of how just our world would be if we all practiced regular acts of kindness--as in getting out of the way and REALLY listening to one another.

 

Yet, no matter how kind we feel ourselves to be at our core, it becomes all too easy to forget this one, basic truth--to get caught up in our heads, to feel that it is more important to get where we are going than to BE with the person in front of us, to feel that it is just too hard to reach out when life is pouring down on us.  But what truly matters most, what changes lives, what transforms our world, is our small actions, our ability to be kind to the person who stands before us.  

 

If you are questioning your purpose here on this planet...start with tiny acts of kindness, and you will soon discover that your question has been answered--it's easy to think that we have to do something BIG, but how we conduct ourselves and the people we touch when we're on the way to pursuing this big purpose, are really what matter.  If you are overwhelmed with life, if you are terrified of failure, if you have NO IDEA how to climb out of the hole that you find yourself in, be kind to the person in front of you and you will find your power.  Reach beyond your grief, do the vulnerable thing--smile, say hello, stop, listen, validate, seek out all that you share with the person beside you.  What will you find in Kindness' wake?  Joy.  What will you leave in Kindness' wake?  More Joy.  Blossoming lives.  Abounding goodness.

Let's try it, shall  we? :)

 

©2010 Melissa Simonson


WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEBSITE? No problem!--as long as you use this entire blurb with it: As an Astrology Coach, Inspirational Speaker and Singer/Songwriter, Melissa Simonson sees it as her life's work to be an authentic expression of her inner truth, and to assist others in being the same. Melissa creates a space of fun and acceptance as she invites her clients to discover the extraordinary within their everyday lives. By asking powerful questions and bringing the spiritual down to earth through her own stories, she helps individuals realize that joy and abundance are not impossible to obtain, but rather a birth-right that we can realize at any time. To Learn more visit: www.igniteyourvoice.com