Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Bathing in the Mud of Our Lives


"Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?
Can you remain unmoving
till the right action arises by itself?

The Master doesn't seek fulfillment.
Not seeking, not expecting,
she is present, and can welcome all things.
~ The Tao Te Ching, Chapter 15

It is not in pushing or pulling, in forcing ourselves to have certain thoughts over others, or in forcing situations to move in one direction or the other that we cultivate joy in our lives.  It is when we first allow ourselves to feel whatever we are feeling, when we create time and space to bathe in the mud and muck of our existence that we make room for joy to peek it's shining head from below the murky surface.

In a new age of "positive thinking," I believe that people are being sadly misinformed to simply "stop thinking negative thoughts" or in that same vein, "to focus on the positive" when they are feeling anything but positive.  I invite you to raise your hand if it has ever worked for you to stop thinking negative thoughts, to stop feeling down, or to feel joy...on command.  (Ok, so I can't SEE you as you read this, but something tells me you are not raising your hand.)  Just as it rarely works to tell a small child to stop crying and get the desired results, as adults we cannot force our feelings from one direction to the other.  Just as that child will probably start crying harder and louder upon being told to stop, the ego voices in our heads will do the same if we ignore or resist our suffering.  Now don't get me wrong. I am the number one fan of gratitude, and finding beauty amidst the struggle, but I've learned that before I can appreciate the struggle, I have to allow the pain to run its course.  Yes people--a large part of feeling deep joy in our existence is in allowing ourselves to feel like total crap.

In our instant gratification society, we've programmed ourselves to resist all that is uncomfortable, to insure ourselves against unknown threats, to stay inside the lines of expectation in order to avoid unknown consequences.  At any glimpse of discomfort, something inside of us signals that we are standing in the middle of a burning fire, and we do whatever we can to jump out of it.  The irony is that by doing this, we only perpetuate our discomfort and add fuel to the fire of fear within us.  It is only by choosing to face the discomfort, to walk through the fire, that we discover the warm knowing, the sense of deeper fulfillment that inevitably follows; and sometimes "walking through the fire" means being still with our discomfort until we are inspired to act again.  Sitting with discomfort requires patience.  It is a courageous act of surrender.

One of my favorite mantras at the moment is the phrase, "Thy will be done."  This is a phrase that we hear spoken in the "Lord's Prayer" of the Christian tradition, and it is a phrase that I have come to see in a whole new light recently.  To me, when I speak this phrase, I am saying, "I trust you completely God/Universe/Spirit/Source/Life.  I trust that your will is for the highest good of all, and I surrender." In its natural state, all of life is built to thrive.  When I surrender to whatever is unfolding in my life, when I stop pushing and pulling in one direction or the other, I am getting out of the way of my ability to thrive.  I do not have all of the answers, and I never will.  It is only arrogant for me to believe that I can know at all times the best path to take for my life, but when I surrender, when I say, "Thy will be done," I am choosing to see that I am loved by every process that unfolds in my life.  It is in those moments of surrender, that my joy whispers the next step in my ear, and my path is illuminated once more.

In what ways do you resist your thoughts and feelings?  Are there areas of your life that you are trying to force?  Perhaps you have grown attached to an outcome that has become limiting or a vision of your life that has you feeling overwhelmed.  What would happen if you simply allowed yourself to feel it, to sit with that sense of struggle?  What would happen if you stopped running around or trying to "figure it out?"  What if you simply let yourself feel scared?  I invite you to breathe in that awareness.  Just take a couple of deep breaths.  As you allow yourself to wade into the mud of your life, as you choose to be patient while that mud settles and the waters run clear, I invite you to know that you are loved by every process that unfolds in your life.  You are magnificent and lovable even in your most vulnerable moments.  You were born to thrive as all that you are.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.

There is a peace that comes when we choose to honor the truth of what we are feeling.  I invite you to bathe in that truth.  Get messy.  Get muddy.  I hope that you delight in what you find.

©2010 Melissa Simonson

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEBSITE? No problem!--as long as you use this entire blurb with it: As an Inspirational Speaker, Joy Coach and Spiritual Astrologer, Melissa Simonson sees it as her life's work to be an authentic expression of her inner truth, and to assist others in being the same. Melissa creates a space of fun and acceptance as she invites her clients to discover the extraordinary within their everyday lives. By asking powerful questions and bringing the spiritual down to earth through her own stories, she helps individuals realize that joy and abundance are not impossible to obtain, but rather a birth-right that we can realize at any time. Visit www.igniteyourvoice.com to learn more.

*Photo courtesy of: http://www.flickr.com/photos/14833125@N02/2825321490/

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